Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts

Becoming Friends With Misery


Have you ever been in a situation when you think everything around you seems hopeless? Have you ever thought that life is not being fair to you? Have you almost given up on your life? What did you do? Did you just let your life die down while you're still living? Or did you fight your way out of misery?



Merriam - Webster Dictionary defines misery as 1. extreme suffering or unhappiness; 2. something that causes extreme suffering or unhappiness; 3. a very unhappy or painful time or experience. Misery isn't a trivial word. It is how you see it, and however you look at misery, you need to get your way out of it.


Believe me, at a young age, I've been caught by misery for quite several times. I have moved at it in and out throughout my life. Once when my parents didn't have decent jobs and had five kids. Another is when I had to live at my aunt's house away from my family.

Mine was a miserable life. I couldn't name childhood friends because we didn't have permanent residence. My siblings didn't recognize me as their eldest sister when they were younger because I didn't live with them.

Misery taught me Mathematics at a young age of being barely five when I had to roam around the neighborhood to sell banana cue or siopao or whatever there was to sell. When Dad used to fetch me from school, misery let me hid myself under the car's glove compartment because if his Japanese couple boss would see me in the car, they'll fire him as a private driver.

When I was eight, misery made me walk in the dark carrying a cooking stove because we needed to transfer to another house to rent before the sun rises. I was merely six when misery brought me a long term trauma as I ran out of an aunt's house after her husband nearly molested me in exchange of a coconut bar.

When I was down to my final semester in college, misery changed my entire life when Dad passed away so suddenly. He was 47 with six young children. Misery had been with me since childbirth when I was forced to come out of Mom's womb because if I don't, we'll both die or one of us at least.

Everyone meets misery, but not everyone is able to survive its cruelty. Others just quit while others pick up their broken pieces and put themselves together.

In the darkest, most miserable points of my life, I learned that only very few of the people around you will stay to lift you up. In most parts of your struggle, you are alone.

To always be able to find your way out of misery, it is important that you change your disposition in life. As famous Anne Frank said, 
I don't think of all the misery but of the beauty that still remains.


I am glad my parents had an unruffled disposition of raising us decently despite the poverty we were going through. I have stayed away from them for a little while, but they didn't fail to let me feel that they're there with all the support and love. Misery came and went, but we were intact.

With my painful past, I didn't blame my parents nor God for living such a harsh life. I was happy that we've surpassed the insurmountable sufferings we had.

Living away from my family taught me independence. Seeing my parents with unstable jobs made me realize how important education and stable job are.


I thank misery because while I was still at a young age, I learned how to add and subtract. While I hid under the glove compartment, I realized how hard it was to earn a living. While I walked in the dark with that stove, I learned that having a permanent shelter is important in marriage.

When I ran out of that house with the coconut bar, I became conscious that not all friendly men are friends. When Dad passed away, I learned to stand for Mom and my siblings. When I learned about how I was born, I recognized the importance of my life.


Misery changed how I look at life and life changed my definition of misery. It has contributed so much to my being that it gave me a positive effect rather than negative, I have befriended misery by conquering it, not by giving in to it.